The Stages of Having a CRUSH

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Have you ever had a crush? Do you have a crush right now? Do you think you might have one in the future? Well then come on, give it a read!

STAGE 1. Staring at the person in question

Now you’re sitting on the bench in your university or some other place. You see this person going with their friends, probably laughing, probably studying, probably eating or drinking something.

And suddenly you’re not listening to your friend anymore. Why you ask? Because you are flat out staring at the person and that person has no idea you are doing that.

This is the moment when your crush actually starts but you’re not aware of it yet because you are too distracted by their face or body or movements.

STAGE 2. Asking your friend to know their name

Now that your friend has noticed you are staring at them, they are probably going to push you to talk to them if they look that attractive to you. But because you’re too nervous, you’re probably not going to. So you ask your friend or someone to get to know what their name is.

 

STAGE 3. Stalking them

You got to know the name of the person. So now you search each and every social media trying to look for their account. You find an account and stalk the absolute bananas out of it.

And then you accidentally tap like on a pic from 53 weeks ago, and you internally scream.

STAGE 4. Adding them to your social media account

After internally screaming, or perhaps screaming loudly, you now have to resort to actually adding them because it sure would be awkward if you didn’t do that.

STAGE 5. Talking to them

You talk to them to get to know them, duh! You ask them the weirdest questions and things while losing your self-respect, because who cares if you’re weird, the only thing that matters is you and your crush.

So after stalking and talking, you know a bunch of stuff like how your crush went to Paris in July 2014 with their aunt and uncle or how their father was in hospital when your crush was in grade 6 or the name of the person that held hands with your crush when your crush was in grade 2.

You know their birthday too, so you especially wish them at 24:00 because you want to be special in their eyes.

You even imagine an imaginary relationship with them

STAGE 6: Discussing it with your bestie

What is a crush if you don’t discuss each and every thing about it?

Your best friend is the co-author of all the messages and your best friend even knows when your crush unfollowed that specific enemy of yours, or when was the last time they texted you.

Also, your friend doesn’t really like your crush that much and keep telling you that they are not that attractive as we think they are.

STAGE 7: Ignoring their messages

Now that you’re friends, you start ignoring their messages. Why? So that you don’t look desperate, or clingy, or available all of the time.

And these instructions are coming from your best friend to stop you from becoming an absolute hoe.

It’s like taking a dagger to the heart because you’re slightly concerned if your crush is HURT because you’re not replying to their messages that early.

STAGE 8: The End Result

This is the final result. You’re either a couple or you’re parting ways for good. Maybe even good friends.

 

If you’re a couple, then that means you have managed to make them fall into your trap, I mean love.

If you’re parting ways with your crush, you probably either realized how shit of a person they are after getting to know them or maybe you found someone even better.

It’s also possible they found someone else for themselves.

 

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