Haram: Anything that is forbidden in Islam for a legit reason.
Haram Relationship: Any kind of romantic relationship between a female and a male before marriage, or any romantic relationship between individuals of the same genders.
Now before I get into the weekly “Islamic lecture” let me tell you something. If you’re by chance in a haram relationship and are not aware of it (even though most probably you are) you can stop it right here. You can quit this relationship.
Last week a close friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend. She was in immense pain because she had fallen in love with him. And he was done with her. Like he saying goes,
” Jab dil bhar jata hai tou bahanay mil hee jatay hain.”
And honestly seeing her like this hurts me so much. She is now done with relationships for now. Because of all the pain she has been going through.
See where I am going with this?
Usually I see posts where they explain how girls should stay away from relationships like these. And by relationships like these, I mean all the haram relationships.
But this time I am going to “lecture” both parties.
Islam has commanded us not to be in a relationship like this for a reason.
Hazrat Muhammad (P.B.U.H) said,
“That a needle of iron should prick your head is better than that you touch a non-Mahram woman”
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
لَا يَخْلُوَنَّ رَجُلٌ بِاِمْرَأَةٍ إِلَّا وَمَعَهَا ذُو مَحْرَمٍ
A man must never be alone with a woman unless there is a Mahram with her
In the Quran, it is stated that,
الْيَوْمَ أُحِلَّ لَكُمُ الطَّيِّبَاتُ ۖ وَطَعَامُ الَّذِينَ أُوتُوا الْكِتَابَ حِلٌّ لَّكُمْ وَطَعَامُكُمْ حِلٌّ لَّهُمْ ۖ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الْمُؤْمِنَاتِ وَالْمُحْصَنَاتُ مِنَ الَّذِينَ أُوتُوا الْكِتَابَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ إِذَا آتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ مُحْصِنِينَ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحِينَ وَلَا مُتَّخِذِي أَخْدَانٍ ۗ وَمَن يَكْفُرْ بِالْإِيمَانِ فَقَدْ حَبِطَ عَمَلُهُ وَهُوَ فِي الْآخِرَةِ مِنَ الْخَاسِرِينَ
“This day [all] good foods have been made lawful, and the food of those who were given the Scripture is lawful for you and your food is lawful for them. And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you, when you have given them their due compensation, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse or taking [secret] lovers. And whoever denies the faith – his work has become worthless, and he, in the Hereafter, will be among the losers.” [Al-Maidah: 5]
Now as to WHY is it haram?
Basically, the intercourse is haram. It is zina in Islam. Now, you’ll say if there is no direct command in the Quran, how can you say that a relationship which has no sexual intercourse involved, how can that be Haram?
Well, for one, it is forbidden because in one way or another, one leads to intercourse.
Two, it is to save both the people in the haram relationship from pain.
Three, it saves you from further problems like “accidentally” getting pregnant.
Four, think about it, if a man or a woman has previously been in a haram relationship, would you think he/she would have no problem in doing that again EVEN after marriage?
Five, if you get emotionally attached to the person you’re in a relationship with, or suppose fall in love with them, and for some reason you don’t end up getting married, you end up empty inside and develop trust issues.
Six, if what I have mentioned in the sentence above DOES happen, but you get married to someone else, is that person at fault for trying to love you and get nothing as such in return?
Seven, would you like to tell your future children how you both were in a relationship before marriage?
So think about all these things, if you have previously been in a haram relationship, are thinking of being in one or you already are.